Taffy Was a Hacker

Printers

Taffy was a hacker, Taffy was a fink
Taffy wrecked my BubbleJet by using homemade ink
I went to Taffy's house, Taffy was away
His wife gave me their LexMark; now I'll have fun today.
dmw
Taffy was a hacker, he drove a Subaru.
Taffy smeared my scanner lens with some funky goo.
I went to Taffy's pad and did a thing most groovy
The next time that he tries to print will be a horror movie
ldw
Taffy was a hacker, Taffy was a curse
He tried to fix my DeskJet, but only made it worse
I went to Taffy's house; Taffy said, "No prob."
So I burned out his LaserJet with a huge printing job.
dmw
Taffy was a hacker, full of spite and bile
FDISKing all my hard drives really made him smile
I went to Taffy's house, my Excimer all set
His HP PostScript printer is now a lasered-jet
ldw
Taffy was a hacker, Taffy was a fret
Taffy took the RAM chips from my LaserJet.
I went to Taffy's house, and, as was Taffy's manner
I removed the cathode light from his Epson scanner.
dmw
Taffy was a hacker, Taffy was a fraud
Taffy set my modem for 300 baud
I went to Taffy's house while Taffy ate a meal
I replaced his BubbleJet with a daisy wheel.
dmw
Taffy was a hacker, Taffy acted rash.
His beta hieroglyphic font made my printer crash.
I went to Taffy's house, my anger, there, to quell.
Two dozen homemade PostScript fonts retaliated well.
dmw
Taffy was a hacker who really rankled me
He changed my ink jet cartridge, but placed it crookedly
I went to Taffy's house, my Epson sloshed with ink
And dumped the eth'lene glycol down his kitchen sink
dmw
Taffy was a hacker and nasty he would be
Taffy nulled my CD-ROM installing WinXP
I went to Taffy's house while he went for a tan.
I destroyed his firewall. Now hosts he Wi-Fi LAN
spx Taffy was a H@kk3R, Taffy was a sham
He installed non-compliant counterfeit stamped RAM
I went to Taffy's house while he shopped for heat sinks...
To interrupt his BIOS flash. His chips are tiddly-winks
spx
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